Say Goodbye to Girl Hate

 


      You. Yes, you behind that screen, I see you! Girls, have you watched a girl walk past you and immediately noticed a so called flaw or felt a tinge of jealousy then proceeded to grumble about her to someone else? I certainly have in numerous occasions. Now, have you been on the other side of that fence and had people express displeasure towards you or spoken about you behind your back? Perhaps a group of girls at a party would not acknowledge you? It's not the greatest feeling, especially when you've experienced it time and time again. 

Why do we do it to each other? Perhaps we're afraid of rejection, feeling left out or it's our own insecurity toying with our mind with thoughts like "your friends will like her more than they like you", "look she's got everything together, unlike you do", or the more commonly "she's way better than you are"

I personally believe that this has stemmed from the ideals that society has spread like wildfire through social media platforms. Women are expected to be healthy, hard working, perfectly symmetrical, fashionable, little to no body hair with a full head of soft voluminous hair on our heads, the list will only keep getting longer. These ideals shroud our conscience which in turn affects the way we look at ourselves and the women around us. We become quick to judge and often fail to uplift and encourage the women around us. Girl hate isn't something that only occurs between two strangers, it can also come from some of your closest friends. I'm sure some of you have a particular instigator in mind whilst you read this, I have a few in mind too and that's okay. It's okay because this is where we draw the line, this is where we stop tolerating girl hate and counteract it by promoting girl love. 

     Not every woman is an instigator of girl on girl hate but each woman has encountered it in one way or another. No matter what the encounter was, each woman plays an important role in the end of girl hate. It begins with self love - learn to look in the mirror and learn how to love yourself, embrace those wide shoulders, put on that halter top and strut your stuff with your head held high! This particular example was one I hold close because I personally would never wear halter tops due to being insecure about my broad shoulders but I have learnt to love them in the recent weeks and now I am the proud owner of 3 halter neck items of clothing. Do you see a girl with eyeliner so on fleek, it could cause harm to the general public? Compliment her on it! Odds are, she thought it was an off day and they were uneven or she was so proud of her eyeliner but people are yet to notice how sharp they are. Build your friends up, encourage them to step out of their comfort zone and to give their all to achieve the goals they set for themselves! 

Perfection is a joke. It is unachieveable, impossible and the ideals that have been set for us are absolutely ludacris. Let's put an end to these unattainable societal standards that have been set for us, and create a new societal standard for ourselves. One that revolves around Girl Love, in which we love ourselves and each other, we pick each other off the floor and encourage each other to be the best person we can be. 

Why do we live according to the expectations others have set for us when we should live according to the the expectations we set for ourselves?


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